What to Do When the “It’s-too-hard” Voice Gets Louder Than the “Attagirl!” Voice

I didn’t just trip, I fell into a canyon. There were a few months where sugar had me by the throat and I was crying “Uncle!” I gave up. I gave in. I couldn’t walk into the grocery store or Casey’s without surrendering my will to sugar. I drew the line at donuts, though–but isn’t that crazy? Why did I think that sugar cookies were an acceptable cheat, but donuts were off-limits? Why did I think that carrot cake or peach cobbler or anything else on the dessert bar was okay to indulge in, but, what? Potatoes or rolls?!! No way, no how! Are you crazy?! I’d rather die than eat mashed potatoes or a hot, fluffy roll or macaroni and cheese. Biscuits and gravy? Get that poison out of here! But, what, you got a sugar cookie at Casey’s and didn’t bring me one?!!

Oh, the games our minds play.

I almost got to the point where I loathed myself. How could I keep on giving in like that? The “It’s-too-hard” voice was drowning out the “Attagirl!” voice in my head.

Do you remember the old Cherokee adage about the grandfather telling his grandson about the internal fight between two wolves? One wolf was evil, full of anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, self-pity, arrogance, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. The other wolf was good, full of love, joy, peace, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith. The grandson asked which wolf would win, and the grandfather responded, “The one you feed.”

I had been starving the “Attagirl!” inside me. Every time I threw a sugar cookie to the “It’s-too-hard” Dirinda, the more she was filled with greed, sorrow, regret, guilt, and self-pity. Boy, was she greedy. One sugar cookie wasn’t enough, and two were just barely enough.

The sorrow that the greed set into motion was too much to bear, and the regret, guilt and self pity were no fun, either.

The real danger is that the “It’s-too-hard” voice teeters on becoming the “What’s-the-point” and “I-can’t-do-this” voice. That’s where the “It’s-too-hard” lies start coming in. Tomorrow I’ll start back, tomorrow I’ll start back, tomorrow I’ll start back soon turns into a month gone by the wayside.

Start pulling for the “Attagirl!” Root for the “Attagirl!” A lot of people like to cheer for the underdog, but don’t think of your precious “Attagirl!” as an underdog. She is strong. She is brave. She is beautiful. She is an achiever. She is a winner. Give her a chance and let her succeed.

Yesterday I fed my “Attagirl!” more than my “It’s-too-hard” voice. I had a peanut butter cheesecake shake for breakfast, Triple Zero yogurt and an apple for afternoon snack and a strawberry cheesecake shake for dinner. Dirinda: 1 – Sugar cookies: 0.

As a matter of fact, I have been helping my “Attagirl!” win all this week. She is getting stronger because I’ve been feeding her. I have been kind to the “Attagirl!” voice, and it’s getting louder every day.

If you don’t think you have voices in your head, think again. Maybe they’re not audible, but they are at the very least quite present in your subconscious. What tape is running in the background of your brain? Is it a self-defeating, self-hating voice or is it a self-preserving, encouraging voice?

Feed the right voice and the right voice wins.

I went to the grocery store this morning and came out with only two cartons of 1% cottage cheese, a carton of unsweetened almond milk and some light whipped topping. Attagirl! Every small victory is a cheer for Attagirl! She’s your friend. Root for her. Give her a leg up. Help her to succeed.

19 thoughts on “What to Do When the “It’s-too-hard” Voice Gets Louder Than the “Attagirl!” Voice”

  1. Great comeback story, Dirinda! For your Attagirl, that is. I find it hard in the winter to get any motivation to do anything, and I am also coming out of my slump. What a good reminder that I am my own worst enemy, or biggest, loudest, craziest cheerleader! We’ve got this, girlfriend! I am working on the prep cooking for 2 again, more than the last few months. Preparing is so important with THM. If you have something that you love ready to grab and go, it BECOMES the easy choice, instead of the evil cookies. And if you love cookies, start experimenting with THM cookie recipes. You may find it is easier than you think to have that cookie and eat it too!
    P.S. on my journey to find my passion and follow it, I have a pen name now. I am the same Tish Webber from before, but I have added to the name in creating a pen name.

  2. Thank you so much for this, could be me, but I don’t write that well. 🙂 Needing to feed my “Attagirl!” some breakfast. Love reading your posts, you’ve been an inspiration.

  3. I am proud of you! You could be ME, and I so want to get out of this slump I am in. Press on, Dirinda!
    Sandy Latimer

  4. I love this and so what I need to hear right now too! Life has gotten busier and I use that as an excuse even thought my inner voice is constantly reminding me but I have been choosing not to listen.

  5. Great post, Dirinda! My “Attagirl” voice has been a bit weak lately. She needs to make a comeback! Thanks for sharing!

  6. Thank you for being so real! I have had the same issues as you. I’ve been trying to do THM for 3 years, I know the plan inside and out, but have seen little success because of my sugar addiction. It wasn’t until I finally overcame that addiction till I was able to stick to the plan. Look into I Quit Sugar by Sarah Wilson. Very compatible with THM. I did her program for a few weeks and transitioned easily back to my beloved THM plan. Best thing I ever did!

    1. Thank you so much for the recommendation, Lisa! I will either get it from the library or order it! I’ve been looking over food addiction books, but haven’t arrived at a decision as to which ones to buy, yet.

  7. I’ve been on THM for 3 1/2 years – faithfully…until January. Life got messed up and I fell off. I’ve been back on plan for 1 1/2 days, after weeks of “I’ll start tomorrow”. I REALLY needed this! Thank you!!!

  8. I think anyone could put our name where yours is! That post spoke volumes to me. Thanks for sharing.

  9. You are a super gal. Not glad you fell, but nice to know you are human. Returned from hospital yesterday after spending overnight after some, have too, surgery! Woke up this morning to an 8 lb. gain. I ate three meals in the hospitable, all on plan. Hubby, brought 4 on plan cookies from the freezer— can those put on 8 lbs? Whatever it is, I know I cannot gain 8 lb. after 1 night in the hospital. SOoooo, I just get back to what I know is right and wait for “things” to come back into shape!

    1. Sorry for your surgery and hospital stay. If you were on an IV of any kind, that might account for the weight gain. I know my daughter put on a lot of weight because of IVs when she was in the hospital.

      1. Thank you thank you Dirinda I so need this!! I’ve fallen off and need to get off sugar so I can get rid of weight I’ve gained back.. Sugar is a terrible addiction! I can and will do this with Gods help and support from awesome woman like you who are so honest and real. I will be praying for you and look forward to your blog!! Can’t wait for your up dates. I went and ordered that book I quit sugar, will be getting Monday!!
        God Bless you Dirinda and all the other ladies who struggle with keeping on track. Let’s lift each other up in prayer and keep in touch!! Happy Mother’s Day to all you wonderful young and older ladies. May God bless us all!!!

        1. Let me know what you think of that book! I’m on the lookout for sugar/food addiction books! Happy Mother’s Day to you, too, Diane!

  10. Thank you for that… I’ be been having a struggle lately too!!!
    We need to encourage one another.
    You are very inspirational… praying for you:)

  11. You are beautiful to me. So honest, encouraging and openly vulnerable. Celebrating that Atta Girl is being fed. I’ve had a similar experience. Am starting to regroup.

    1. Thank you, Louise. I put together two good days in a row and haven’t had a sugar cookie all week! Major victory! I may be having several days of a couple of protein shakes a day. I had two yesterday and two today. They keep me full and make me feel like I’ve had ice cream. Whatever works, right?

  12. I’m preparing to re-enter the THM life. I’ve cleaned the pantry and lined up my “have to have” items. I’m slowly returning and after our cruise for our 50th Wedding Anniversary, I’m going full throttle ahead. I won’t let the weight be a stumbling block to a great trip!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *